Food For Thought

“Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
Brown paper packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things.”

I haven’t seen the movie, “The Sound of Music” in years..so why is that song running over and over through my head?

I like the tune okay but can’t possibly imagine what caused it to suddenly pop from the subconscious to the conscious between the time I fell asleep last night until I awoke this morning. I did see a Julie Andrews biography..but that was quite a while ago.

I have been thinking about some of my least favorite things lately. Maybe that’s it. More specifically, foods that most people like and think I’m supposed to like too but don’t.

Olive oil, for example. I’ve been paying through the nose for extra virgin olive oil at the store because all the TV chefs use it and it’s supposed to be good for you. We ran out of it the other day so I used butter and a little corn oil to cook some eggs. They were delicious! I sautéed some onions and peppers the same way. Terrific! No funny aftertaste. I also don’t like bread dipped in olive oil at Italian restaurants that everybody seems to go gah gah over.

Cilantro is another alleged food item that I don’t like. To me, this popular herb used primarily  in Mexican, Italian and Middle Eastern cooking, tastes like someone peeled soap chips onto my enchilada.  I’m not alone in this. The beloved chef Julia Child enjoyed eating and cooking most everything but detested cilantro. There’s even an “I hate cilantro” website.

You can put rare meat on my yuk list as well. My friend Bob Miller, longtime owner of  the Brandon Steak House, used to just shake his head in disgust when I’d order a filet “medium well.” “That’s a terrible thing to do to a nice piece of meat,” he’d say. I’ll have to butterfly it.”  “Fine,” I’d reply..as he went back into the kitchen muttering something that sounded like what Ralphie said in “A Christmas Story” when he dropped the lug nuts.

Our daughter, Christy and my friend Hemmingsen are two examples of people who believe that fire is the enemy of a steak and (I think just to show off) will spend several minutes explaining to the server just how rare they want their meat…no more than 30 seconds per side..or some such nonsense.

If I had to look down at a plate with a hunk of luke-warm flesh swimming in a puddle of blood..I’d become a vegetarian faster than you could say e-coli.food steak

I don’t like orange juice with pulp, Imitation Baileys Irish Cream, (yes, there is a difference) anything seasoned with hot..hot chili peppers, (Why should eating be painful?) bananas, (just something about the texture that automatically induces gagging.) and, perhaps most controversial of all; seafood!

How can someone of my ancestry not like fish?

I could lose a lot of weight if all there was in the world to eat were lobsters, oysters, crabs, salmon or most anything that lives in the water…including lutefisk!  I don’t mind a tuna sandwich; breaded shrimp or fish without the bones dipped in beer batter and deep fried. But nibbling on a trout that’s presented on a plate with its skin still attached and it’s dead black eyes staring back just creeps me out. food troutSo does the thought of eating raw oysters: having them slide off the half shell down your throat and bragging to your buddies how many you ate and how great they were while never having chewed a one.. And, hey, you can call that liquid these grey creatures live in “oyster liquor” if you want to but we all know it’s just slime.food oysters

I suppose I’ve made a few of you angry showing such disrespect for your favorite culinary cuisines.

I’m sorry. And just to show there are no hard feelings I leave you with another lovely Disney tune:

“It’s a small world after all. It’s a small world after all..it’s a small world after all..it’s a small small world.”

You’re welcome and bon appetit!

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5 Comments

  1. I would agree with you on everything! Except, I won’t eat a steak that has any red!! Seafood in any form is not for me!! I’d probably be 100# lighter if I’d eat that. (I really struggled in Spain)

  2. I love cilantro!! I didn’t use to, but now I do. I’m with you on the fish that “looks” at you from the serving platter……..nope!! Not gonna happen!!! Our Grandma Anundson ordered that once and about died when it came with the head on it still. Oh how we all laughed!!

  3. I am also in agreement with you with one exception…beef steak .

    My wonderful maternal grandparents would very carefully select the finest quality
    prime grade beef and the Grandma would proceed to turn the beautiful prime
    steaks in to HOCKEY PUCKS. To this day I don’t understand how they could eat, and enjoy,
    those ultra tough military armor quality “steaks”. At about age 12 I received their
    permission to cook my own medium rare steaks when with them! The cooking experience
    was enhanced by their laughter and humorous comments about the steak still
    mooing, the steak needing too be roped before it ran away, and many others.

    All in all the hockey puck steaks are a another happy and fun memory about the best
    grandparents any kid could ever hope for!

  4. I’m with you on trout and cilantro, Doug. I might have put beets on the list a few years ago, too, but I discovered pickled beets, and oh my. I’m searching for the perfect recipe. I haven’t tried regular beets, though. Oh and WHY do people order liver and onions in a perfectly nice restsurant!?

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